I present to you, Dimitri

So a girl was out with friends having drinks on King St (in Toronto). This guy approaches her and won’t leave her alone – keeps saying how *elegant* she is. She finally gives in and hands the guy her business card. The attached is an MP3 file of not one, but TWO voicemails this guy left her.

This goes down in the history books – especially the second voice mail. Ladies: this is what’s out there…. So have a listen…and a belly-laugh, and thank your lucky stars you are either single, or not with this guy!

Click here for the audio file.

Date Night #3

Date night #3 was on Tuesday just gone and achieved a couple of things beside being date night.  Firstly we combined “valentine’s day” with date night, so we made this one a little bit extra special.  Secondly, we went to one of the six Melbourne restaurants that I want to cross of my 101 List, ezard.  It was such a lovely night, and you can read all about it with my review of the restaurant over here.

A is for Adam

This is the beginning of a meme that I will call the Dictionary of Me. It started over at Bella Dia’s blog and I found it on Cherry Blossom Adventures. Although I know I won’t be as disciplined to do one letter per day, I think it’s a great opportunity to open up to anyone reading my blog and also to help me fine tune my writing skills. I often post on here with a spare five or ten minutes, not giving much consideration to the style or composition, and it’s something I want to minimise from now on.

I encourage comments, because I find it hard to open up at the best of times, but it’s even more difficult when I don’t even know that anyone is listening. I encourage you to share back, particularly when you can identify with what I am writing. It’s nice to hear that you’re not alone!

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And so I begin with A is for Adam.

Adam is my partner. We met in January 2005 when we were working on a television program together. Our interaction throughout the production of the show was limited, in fact it wasn’t until May 2005 that we had a conversation that lasted longer than about 90 seconds. According to him, he’d taken notice of me straight away, but said I looked ‘very important’ because I was always in a rush (LOL). Then one weekend, I brought my son to the set with me and at that point he’d assumed I was married. So the flirting was limited until the night of the wrap party, when several alcoholic beverages coupled with cheesy cover band music and a dance floor meant that we got a little more up close and personal.

Our versions of the story from there will differ, mainly because I went home early that night and denied him a drunken snog. He will also claim that I was the next person to make contact, when in fact it was Adam who emailed me the very next day. A week or so of flirtatious emails and he asked me out for a drink. Although he will claim it was me who suggested the drink.

Either way, we had our first ‘date’ on May 26th, 2005. It consisted of 6 bars, 50 or so drinks, limited food and 5 hours of non-stop conversation. We swapped shoes because we discovered we had the same sized feet. We swapped stories about our lives and our loves. We swapped spit at about 1am in a dark corner of Der Raum.

The following couple of months were very casual. I’m not one to ever rush into a relationship and overly keen guys tend to scare me a bit, so the casual development of our relationship was just my speed. Of course from Adam’s point of view – a perpetual bachelor with only one serious relationship to speak of in his 33 years – he was coming to grips with the possibility of committing to a woman with a child.

It was a Saturday night in July that we turned a corner into a serious relationship. I was having two of my dearest friends over for dinner and on the Friday night, I met a few of Adam’s friends and it was hard to miss the obvious ploy to have himself invited to my dinner party the following night. I cast a casual invitation as I left for the evening that night, and proceeded to freak out in the car on the way home. That casual invitation meant three things. a) he was going to meet two of my friends, whose opinion I valued highly, b) he was coming to my house which at the time was a 30 minute drive out of the city which in turn meant he would probably need to stay the night, which in turn meant c) he was going to meet my son for the first time. EEEEK!!!

That evening went surprisingly well, and the following morning the meeting between my son and Adam also went more smoothly than I expected (although I think I was flipping out about it to the point where I forgot to speak most of the morning). And so from there it was like a switch had been moved to the ON position and our relationship blossomed.

Since that time, like any couple, we have had our highlights and our lowlights.

The highlights include, in no particular order:

  • our two week trip to Vietnam together in May 2006, given to me for Christmas in 2005
  • the incredible email exchange and stolen phone calls while Adam was overseas for 6 weeks at the beginning of our relationship
  • our weekend away to Healesville in a cottage , just the three of us
  • our ten course degustation dinner at Momo‘s with two of my best friends
  • our New Year’s Eve stay in Palm Beach in Sydney in 2005 with two of my friends and two of his
  • our subscription to the MTC in 2006
  • our Christmas’ together in 2005, 2006 and 2007
  • our roadtrip up the north coast of NSW in December 07 and January 08
  • the friend’s weddings we’ve been to together

The lowlights cannot be overlooked, because currently we’re giving this relationship our third shot:

  • My birthday in 2006 was an unmitigated disaster
  • Our trip to Daylesford in 2006, which was a birthday present, was awkward and disappointing for both of us as we struggled with being on totally separate emotional pages
  • I called it quits the first time in September 2006, and we got back together a month later.
  • The period we were together between November 2006 and January 2007 was some of the most testing times of my life. Again we were not on the same emotional page and the efforts made to repair were undermined with feelings of hurt, distrust, dishonesty and retribution.
  • January 26, 2007 – Australia Day. In the morning I told Adam I could see the contempt he had for me in his eyes. We went to the Big Day Out, had an awesome day and then came home, tore each other’s hearts out and split up again.
  • In May of 2007, we stopped talking altogether after months of deliberating whether it was worth giving another shot. We both moved on with our lives; for him this meant dating another woman, for me this meant hours and hours of psychotherapy with a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist and a string of so many incredibly unsuccessful dates that I considered writing a book.

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Date Night #1

So my first date night was on Tuesday. I’ve diarised it with my partner (he is notoriously disorganised and leaves everything until the last possible moment) and we’ve agreed that we will take it in turns to determine the activities for each date night… so essentially we have to construct one fabulous date night per month, each.

I was first (I need to set the tone, after all!) and for our first date night I was prepared well in advance – I bought us tickets to the Australian Shakespeare Company production of Romeo & Juliet in the Royal Botanical Gardens. I packet up a rug, cheeses, dips, biscuits, olives, crisps, 2002 Shiraz, plastic wine glasses, aeroguard, nuts, tim tams and white chocolate and picked up my beloved and drove him to the gardens. We had a fantastic spot and dug into our food while we chatted about our days and deliberated over whether one of the actors (who was walking around warming up the crowd) was related to a friend of ours…..

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The production was very very funny, it was weird hearing Shakespeare with an Aussie accent, and the director had a lot of fun with the scene where Romeo & Juliet meet at the party held at the Capulet residence. There was singing, dancing, choreographed chorus routines, lines added that would probably make Shakespeare roll over in his grave, such as “Can I have my pants please?” and the best part of all was the sparkly-shirt, sunglass-wearing, quick-witted, record-spinning Mercutio played by Adrian Dart… he completely upstaged everyone and I found myself to be just a little bit in love with him by the end of the first act.

Unfortunately the atrocious acting of the girl that played Juliet meant that the scenes when I would usually find myself sobbing, I found myself sticking my fingers in my ears instead. I am convinced she had no idea what she was saying about 85% of the time. Her performance was unconvincing, monotonous, lacking in any sort of passion – it was BEIGE. Let’s just say it was a relief when Juliet finally topped herself.

But even though she may have ruined the balcony scene and tortured me to the point where I wanted to grab the dagger and do her in myself, we still had a wonderful night together and a perfectly fabulous first date night.