Turn Anxiety Into Anticipation

The background to this post can be found here : Change The Way You See Everything

One of the biggest learnings I got from reading this book was that small shifts in my thinking can make seismic differences in my life.  Asset Based Thinking (ABT) is a choice, it’s not a personality trait that you’re born with.  So in making a conscious decision to focus on ABT behaviours and thought-patterns, over time I have the potential to make a dramatic difference to the way I view the world.

My first perception changer is this:

Striving for perfection creates anxiety.  It’s not an asset, it’s a liability.  That goes for everyday things such as the work I deliver in my career, the food I serve up on the dinner table, my appearance and most importantly, my self-worth.  By seeing myself as a work-in-progress I can take the pressure off and really come to accept who I am, what my limitations are.  I am always learning, always growing and will always commit to making the most of myself… which is true ABT. 

To demonstrate, Deficit Based Thinking (DBT) would be focusing on eliminating flaws…. in myself and in others.  This lesson is so very important in the journey I am taking with my fiance, Adam.  Neither of us are perfect, yet there are times when one expects the other to be just so.  By viewing myself and Adam as a work-in-progress, I can better celebrate the little wins and achievements in our progress than focusing on the distance between where we are now and “perfection”.

So instead of thinking “We’re never going to work out our communication problems before we get married in February”… I am changing my perspective and thinking “What’s the one thing I can do today that will really make a difference to our progress?”



  1. the article is an eyeopener and a valuable introduction to a new way of thinking

  2. […] also may have mentioned before that I am slightly perfectionistic.  When I commit to doing something, I usually am not […]

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